Sallis: [Recites Tweedledum and Tweedledee in French].
Sallis Fallpinio, children's broadcaster in five languages, visited the grounds of Fountains Abbey, near Ripon, Yorkshire, in the afternoon prior to the Violent Unknown Event. Sometime between 4.12 and 4.25, along with some 310 other people, Sallis walked in front of the Temple of Piety.
A carrion crow sat on an oak
Watching a tailor shape his cloak
Wife, cried he, bring me my bow
That I may shoot yon carrion crow.
Subsequently, along with those 310 other afternoon visitors, Sallis suffered from petagium fellitis, loss of weight, an ability to speak and write Cathaganian in its prime version and an involuntary paralysis that was intermittent and sudden, and locked the lower limbs into an immovable stance that could persist for forty minutes.
There was a little man
Who had a little gun
And bullets that were made of lead, lead, lead
He went to the brook
And shot a little duck
Right through the middle of the head, head, head.
Sallis took a photograph of the grounds at about 4.15. Her aunt is there along with a friend of the family. It seems that the closer to the Temple that the visitors wandered, the greater was their subsequent Cathaganian vocabulary and the greater their weight loss. At a range of four hundred yards a visitor could subsequently command a vocabulary of some seventeen thousand Cathaganian words and normally suffered a weight loss of about a stone and a half. An approach of under fifty yards meant a serious debilitating weight loss requiring constant hospital attention.
As I went over the water
The water went over me
I saw two little blackbirds
Sitting on a tree
One called me a rascal
One called me a thief
And I took up my little black stick
And knocked out all their teeth.
Sallis, collector of nursery rhymes, playground songs and children's folklore, believed in the Theory of the Responsibility of Birds and was not surprised in the slightest at the VUE's malevolence, knowing full well the traditional antipathy and antagonism of man towards bird that begins its propaganda in the nursery.
Oh what have you got for dinner Mrs Bond
There's beef in the larder and ducks on the pond
Dilly-dilly, Dilly-dilly, come to be killed
You must be stuffed and my customers filled.
The Falls Biographies
Constance Ortuist Fallaburr
Appis (Arris) Fallabus
Ipson & Pulat Fallari
Bird Raspara Fallicutt
Sallis Pino Fallpinio
Erhaus Bewler Falluper