Standard Fallaby has a DC3
single-berth caravanette with a glass-roof. In winter he hides it among the
hundreds of other caravans on sites in the west of England, ostensibly that it
might escape the scrutiny of his sister Tasida
Fallaby whose attentions, according to Standard, are not ornithological and
exceed those of an orthodox brother and sister relationship.
The VUE Directory Commission have, as yet, not been able to locate Standard
Fallaby or his caravan.
The VUE has contracted Standard's
intestine and paralysed his legs. He is obliged to cling to a
hanging-brace when asked to stand up. He speaks Curdine.
Bwythan Fallbutus:
"Curdine is a cursive language that deliberately fosters
ambiguities and encourages punning.
Tulse Luper has said that, in the larynx of the right man, Curdine would be a
superlative language, an antidote to all the world's feathers."
Since the VUE, Standard Fallaby has developed a passionate
interest in the Corvidae. Every
rook nesting-season he parks his caravan beneath
a rookery somewhere in the west of England within sight of the Atlantic. He has
laid a claim before the World Society for the Preservation of Birds, to have
discovered a rook sub-species, Corvus frugilegus atlanticus, whose diet is
largely shellfish and whose call is imitative of immature seagulls. THE WSPB has
not recognised his claim.
